How A Blind Mom Cleans

Hello Everyone,

I hope you are all doing well.

I get many questions around whether I clean my house or if I have a cleaning person or does my husband do it. The answer is I wish I had a cleaning person but unfortunately, it is me who does the majority of the cleaning. I do have a husband who helps out and three kids who have chores (I know I am a horrible mom) but the bulk of it falls to me.

The main thing that people don’t think that I do is clean the bathroom so today we are going to discuss how I am able to do this. First of all, I know the set up of the bathroom so I am able to locate the loo very easily same with the bathtub and sink.

I have a caddy that has all my cleaning supplies in it, I carry that to the bathroom and then start the process. I really hate cleaning the bathrooms just thought I would throw that out there. I usually start with the mirrors and I touch them and then spray the cleaning on the mirror. I am sure I leave streaks behind every once in a while but I am not using them so that is ok they look clear to me.

 

In the pictures above you can see my caddy as well as how I tell apart the two bottles that feel identical. One is Windex and one is Multi-purpose cleaner, I have two bump on dots on the multi-purpose and one bump on dot on the Windex. This really helps to make sure that I am using the cleaner that I want. The other bottles have a shape or defining feature that I have memorized so I am able to tell which one is which.

Next is the sink and counter, I spray the sink and counter surface with cleaner and then I wipe it down systematically. I start at the one side and work my way down and over the counter in small sections so that I get the whole thing.  I do it almost like a search and rescue crew would search for someone who is missing it is very methodical.

Next is the toilet and I do the same as the sink I just spray down the part of the toilet that I want to start with and work my way around the toilet. Toilets are nasty, I wear gloves to do the toilet because I am blind so I do use my hands to check if I missed any cleaner or if I can feel anything. The bathtub and shower are done the same way.

I try to clean the bathrooms more often so that if I did miss something hopefully I will get it next time. It is possible to do all the cleaning in the house if you do it systematically.

I know it may seem impossible to some that a person who is blind cleans and does all of these “normal” tasks but when blindness is your reality it really isn’t that out there; it needs to be done and we do it. The way we do it is probably different but we definitely do it. In fact, my husband will tell you even though I can not see the world around me, I am a clean freak, it drives him and the kids nuts. If it is out of place I will find it, it must be my super power!

Until Next Time,

Ashley and Rick

Finding that “Me” Time !

Hello Everyone,

Spring has sprung here and I am loving the warmer weather and the need for fewer layers. Things are really starting to pick up around here the kids seem to be busier and wanting to do everything right now.

I have been at work 4 days a week now for a month and we are adjusting to that. I am loving my job but am noticing that more now than ever I need to take some time for myself.  I am also realizing how very important this really is.

When I was staying home with the kids for the last 4 years they were in school all day so I had the ability to take some time for just me each day that I was home. Even when that time was just cleaning with my favorite playlist cranked it was quiet me time, time to reflect.

Now that I am working and trying to juggle everything I did as a stay at home mom with working and getting enough sleep and keeping everyone happy, there are days where I fail miserably.

My days start at 4 a.m. when that dreaded alarm goes off, I then get myself ready for work then on to the dogs and kids lunches. I do pack them and prepare them the night before so I just need to put it all together. Then on to backpacks and making sure it is all ready to go with what they need. Out the door by 5:15 a.m. I don’t mind the early mornings, I am not a morning person by any stretch but I don’t mind getting up. I am grateful to have a job after struggling for so long to be given a chance that no matter what time I had to get up I would.

After work it is home and then supper, homework, showers, family time, lunches, cleaning and then hopefully to bed by 10:30. So the only reason that I am telling you how my day goes is because I am trying to figure out where the “me” time fits in there. I travel to and from work with my husband so we get to have some time alone and to talk about things but I am still left feeling like my cup is emptying.

Making sure that we find time for just us is so important, we are not able to take care of those we love and give to those we love if we have nothing to give. So I know I will be finding some time in this hectic amazing life of mine. What do you to for some me time.

 

A new beginning​ awaits

Hello Everyone,

It would have been my dad’s birthday today, I miss him more than words. He passed away 5 years ago from cancer. One year after he passed away I began to very quickly lose the rest of the vision that I had.

These events in my life have changed me as a person. It has showed me that life is short, when you lose a parent it is hard no matter what age you are. I don’t think it makes it easier when you are an adult. My dad was only 48 years old when he passed away and I felt robbed of the relationship that I had with him. We were very close, we worked side by side in our families bakery and we are a lot alike. I will always treasure the time that we had together especially those happy memories that I carry with me every day.

When I lost my vision I felt robbed of my life as it was, I was angry that I had just started to accept the loss of my dad and now I was thrown this curve ball. I never ever imagined I would have been strong enough to handle losing my vision.

It took me some time but I knew that with the strength that I got from my dad and his stubbornness that I would be ok. This turned out to be the best thing that could have happened to me. I have come so far from the person that I was 6 years ago. I am more confident than I ever would have imagined, and I am extremely happy with where my life has taken me. I also know that my dad is with me on this journey and giving me the strength to conquer anything that comes my way.

Loss seems like the end, but for me this end has been an amazing beginning. I can not wait to see where it goes next  !

Until Next Time,

Ashley and Rick

What Defines Independence?

What makes you independent?

Are you independent if you can do everything on your own and not need any help? Are you less independent if you need to ask for help? What if we looked at independence in another way, what if we were more independent if we were confident enough to know when to ask for help.

There is this presumption that people with disabilities are not as independent as able-bodied people because there are aspects of our lives and days that we need to ask for assistance.

I truly believe that I am more independent because I am confident enough to ask for help. I will give you an example. In order for me to cook meals for my family, I need to be able to go and get groceries. So let me walk you through how this works ad show you that me asking for help makes me more independent than if I was to not ask.

I make my list at home, print it out and head to the store. When I reach the store with my guide dog I then find a counter and ask if there is someone that is able to help me get the items on my list. I will hand them the list and follow them around the store picking up my items. I then pay for the items and head home. After getting home I am able to make meals for my family.

If I did not ask for help I would have to wait for my husband to be able to take me to the store and help me pick out the items that I need. So, me knowing that I need help at the store makes me more independent and able to be like any other parent out there, going to the store and getting groceries to make supper.

Learning to ask for help when you need it does not make you weaker it makes you stronger. It also makes you the most independent version of you! So please never be ashamed or feel less than because you need help with something.

Until Next Time!

Ashley and Rick

Self Discovery

Hello Everyone,

I hope you are all well !

With it being the New Year and everyone talking about what their resolutions are going to be for the next year. I do not feel the need to jump on that band wagon, in fact the opposite. I do not do resolutions for the New Year simply because I am horrible and keeping them and know this.

However I do want to take the next little while and really focus on me and what I want and what makes me happy. I started this blog to help educate people about blindness and to have people see me for more than my disability. I am in awe of the support I have received from complete strangers, and the messages saying how I have helped them. I am so happy to have had the opportunities that I have had over the last year because of the hard work that I have put in, it really did pay off.

So to do this I will be doing posts on the things that I love and the things that happen in my life. I am much more than a person living with blindness. I want to share those things with everyone to show them that blindness does not define our lives. There are so many things that I do in my daily life that have nothing to do with blindness.

There are also many things about me that I have not shared like the fact that I was a teen mom. I had my daughter at the age of 18 and had to grow up very quickly. After I had my daughter I got married at 20 and then had two more children. I have been very focused on being a mother, and wife. I was determined to not be a statistic when it came to being a teen mom and now that I am 32 I feel like it is time to focus on me, really take the time and spend it doing things that bring me absolute joy!

So I hope you are all happy to come along on the journey of discovery over the next little while. I have lots of post ideas and am glad to have you along for the ride of my life!

Until Next Time !

Ashley and Rick

2016 A Time To Reflect

It is hard to believe that 2016 has come and gone! So let me start this off by saying Happy New Year !! Also a huge Thank You! This year has been amazing. I am so grateful to have had the opportunities that have come my way and for all the support that I have received from so many amazing people! All of you that have supported my blog and motivational speaking all hold a special place in my heart!

I am wishing you all a Happy New Year and all the best in 2017! Let’s make it even better than 2016. Living out our dreams and doing the things that we want to do. Not letting others determine how we live our lives and not letting misperceptions and stereotypes get in our way.

I am not one for New Year’s resolutions but I am someone who is constantly striving to be better. I want to always be the best version of me that I can be. I believe that if we live the life that we want and enjoy every minute of it, we will never have regrets.

Thank you all again for all your support and love over the last year and I look forward to sharing the upcoming year with you all!

Happy New Year!

Until Next Time!

Ashley and Rick

 

Blind Caramel Corn

Baking is something that I have grown up loving to do. My parents owned a bakery for 26 years as I was growing up, so I grew up in a bakery really. I spent many hours there beside my dad and my mom baking and decorating and packaging. I loved to bake I helped my dad with everything from bread, buns, cakes, cookies, pies and donuts it was definitely something that I hold dear to my heart today.

My dad sadly passed from cancer 5 years ago, to this day when I bake it brings back such amazing memories of spending hours and hours with my dad baking up a storm. This is something that I really want to have with my kids as well. My children love to bake with me and we have so much fun doing it.

Being blind some people think that baking is not something that I would be able to do, but I learned to bake with low vision which meant I learned to do it with my hands and not my eyes. So even though I am totally blind today I am still able to enjoy it just as much as before.

Around the holidays I have many recipes that my children and I love to make. We love baking cookies, squares and especially love making many batches of caramel corn. So what a great way to share my love of baking with you then to share our quick and easy caramel corn recipe. It is always a hit around the holidays or any other time you whip up a batch.

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Carmel Corn Recipe
1 cup margarine
1 cup brown sugar (packed)
1 cup white sugar
1/2 cup corn syrup (I use about 3/4 cup)
Pinch of cream of tartar
1 tsp baking soda
20 cups popcorn

-Pre Heat oven to 200c
-In a saucepan combine margarine, brown sugar, white sugar, corn syrup, and cream of tartar. Make sure the saucepan has some room as this will foam up and almost double.
-Bring to a boil while constantly stirring, once boiling let boil for 2 minutes.
-Remove from heat and stir in baking soda it will foam up a little.
-Pour over popcorn in a large roaster and stir until all the popcorn is coated.
-Bake for 1 hour stirring every 15 minutes. Put onto cookie sheets once you remove it from the oven to cool. Enjoy !

I hope you enjoy making this easy recipe and enjoy making memories that will last a lifetime!

Until Next Time!
Ashley and Rick

Three Rules To Remember About Service Dogs…

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Rule One : IGNORE

So many times people will approach a service dog team and want to say hello to the dog. Or interact with the dog by talking to them and saying things about how good they are or how cute. The problem with this is that you are getting the dogs attention and when you have the dog’s attention they are not paying attention to the handler thus putting the handler in a dangerous situation. Simply ignore the dog if you think the dog is cute or doing a good job, by all means, make that comment to the handler. We love to get compliments about our dogs they are like our children we are proud mamas and papas.

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Rule Two: IGNORE

Petting a service animal is not ok ever. Even if my guide dog is laying under a table, if we are in public he is working. Never come up and just start petting them. Also saying things like, “I know I shouldn’t pet them, but he is just too darn cute.” does not make it okay, in fact, that is worse. If you absolutely can not walk by and feel the desire to pet them ask the handler first. Remembering that there is a person on the other end of the leash is key. Treat the person on the other end of the leash with the respect you would want to be treated with when you are in public.

Put yourself in my shoes for a moment; It is the end of a busy day and I need to grab a couple of things from the store, I run into the store and get stopped at least five times. People are stopping me because they are curious about my dog or they want to tell me about the lab they used to have as a kid, or even about a blind person they knew back in the day. I am glad that we can connect however I am in a rush to get home to my kids and make supper, I am exhausted and before coming into the store I have been stopped by prob 10 people before you today. It is exhausting sometimes we just want to run into the store and get some milk and leave, just like you. Could you imagine if you were stopped 10-15 times a day just for someone to make a random comment (not always nice) on the way you are traveling or about how cute your shoes are and could they touch them.

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Rule Three: IGNORE

Making comments or suggesting that we are treating our dogs poorly because we are out in the winter, or rain, or just working a dog, in general, is not ok. guide dogs and other service dogs are treated better than you could ever imagine. They are spoiled rotten, given more love, attention, and affection than you could ever imagine. They love to work and love being with their handler.

If you ever come across a guide dog or service dog know that they are treated like a king or queen and that we are more than grateful for what they do for us. Living with a disability is a challenge but being able to have the assistance of a dog makes all the difference in independence and freedom for those that choose to have a service dog.

Life with a service dog can be complicated when people do not ignore the dogs. When you see me and my Guide Dog act as if I am using a white cane. You would never pet, make kissy noises, stop me to talk about my white cane so if you act as if I was using a white cane, service dog handlers will be forever grateful.

I hope that these 3 simple rules make it easy for people to remember to respect and interact appropriately with service dogs of all types.

Blind Christmas Joy

Hello Everyone, I hope you are all doing well.

December is here and so Christmas is just around the corner. I love Christmas and everything that goes along with Christmas. All the memories that are made, time spent with friends and family, the decorations and sights and sounds everything.

I have been asked before if I decorate for Christmas since I can not see it, the answer is YES ! I do not think that you need to be able to see decorations to appreciate them.

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I may go about buying my decorations differently for sure but I sure love walking the Christmas isles in the stores and looking at all the decorations. I feel them all and I buy my decorations based on the way that they feel. I like to have lots of different textures, I do not buy a lot of lights and things like that as I do not see them however my kids love them so we do have some. My children also love Christmas and when we are looking at the decorations they always say things like “oh mom feel this one I think you will like it” then they will proceed to describe it to me. This is one of the best things about the holidays, having the descriptions of things going on around us from my children as they have grown is something I cherish and look forward to every year.

Having a blind mother has definitely made our holiday celebrations different but we take part in all the activities and my children are always describing the decorations on people homes, the lights on the poles around town, people Christmas trees. This is a memory that I will forever have with me. One of my other favorite things about the holidays is the smells and sounds, the smells of baking and trees and nutmeg, cinnamon, they all bring me a lot of joy. I love the sounds of the shopping malls during the holidays, with the music, the bells from Santa greeting children, the hustle, and bustle, the sound of joy in the voices of the children.

There are so many ways to experience the world around us, vision is only one way. Happy Holidays to all my readers and I hope you have a wonderful Holiday Season !

Until Next Time
Ashley and Rick

Blindness the least of my struggles

Hello, Everyone !

I hope you are all doing well.

I was talking to someone recently and mentioned that I see a counsellor and they responded with ” I would too if I was blind”. I was surprised by this answer. Then the more I thought about it, I am sure that there are many many people out there who assume that I would need to see a counsellor because of living with blindness or any disability.

I talked with my husband after and kind of laughed a little because to be completely honest I do NOT see a counsellor because I am blind and or have a disability. I do NOT talk to my counsellor about being blind. I know that some people can not fathom that that would not be my biggest problem. For me my blindness is not an issue, I am happy with my life as a blind person. I am comfortable with my blindness and since I do not let my blindness determine how I live my life it really doesn’t cause me any problems. I have issues with other people misperceptions of blindness and my abilities but I have lived with that my whole life and enjoy proving people wrong.

I am so much more than a blind person and I have lived a lot in my life and see a counsellor  because I am a mother to 3 children. My 13-year-old daughter also has ADHD. Being a parent can be a challenge especially to teenagers and when you have a child with ADHD it can really make things difficult. I also lost my father to cancer almost 5 years ago, I was very close with my dad in the years before he passed but we also had many issues that we never got a chance to deal with. There are so many other things in my life that I have had to work through. And even though I am blind, that is not one of those things.

If I could give any advice on this topic, it would be; don’t assume that someone’s disability is their biggest struggle. The person with a disability lives their life every day just like you do and they have things happen that have absolutely nothing to do with their disability . Just because our reality is different than yours that does not mean that our disability consumes our lives to the point where we don’t live them.

Thank you for reading ! Have a fabulous day !

Until Next Time !

Ashley and Rick